Why the stress???

Good morning... a stressful one... but still good nonetheless...

Why is it that I have extremely high levels of stress every Wednesday lately???  I thought it might help me to figure it out if I blogged it.  It does help to get the thoughts out sometimes.  On the surface it's easy to figure out or so it seems.  I am stuck sitting a position I don't normally sit... so it decreases the amount of time I have to myself while I'm not sitting on scope.  I have (or HAD) a good workout planned for today... it's just a matter of whether or not I get to do it.  I'm stuck sitting in the command post... been here since 7:45... it's now 10:35.  I hate sitting here.  I'm not really sure why other than the fact that I feel stuck or trapped.  It's the only thing I can come up with.  It's not like you're tied to the chair here like when you're on scope, though.  It's different.  There's TV... and you can email... and surf the web... etc., none of which is stressful stuff.  I get stressed because of not being able to do things like leave for meals or to work out, especially knowing I do have to sit on scope from 3-7... so every minute that passes (now it's 11 AM) stresses me a little more because it crunches my time window down a minute at a time... then 30 minutes... then an hour... you can see where I'm headed here....

Today is especially stessful... but it's about to change for the better... will write more later but most likely not until this evening... it's time to go and workout...
Ok... I'm back from the workout and lunch... and the stress is COMPLETELY GONE!  Imagine that???  I had a fantastic 45 minute run outside followed by 20 minutes of walking.  71 minutes total counting my warm up walk as well.  It's gorgeous out today... sunny with a very nice cool breeze.  It was a perfect day to shed the treadmill for the great outdoors! :)  A tasty Subway steak and cheese sub and a few Cheetos, and I'm feeling like I just conquered the world!  I am wiped out but in a very good way from my workout.  I had such an awesome runner's high afterward, too!  It was only the 5th time I've ran outside here, and I went about DOUBLE my longest distance of the other 4.  I'm ready for my shift in 45 minutes with a much better, stress free feeling.

It's so sad that I get stressed over such a petty thing... it's just something I'm unable to control regardless of how hard I try.  In fact, the harder I try the WORSE it gets.  I know everyone gets stressed sometimes, so maybe it's just normal.  After all, I have not really been very stressed at all during my 3 months here, so it's bound to happen at some point, right?  I know part of it.  It's having my routine broken or even unknown that causes it.  My mind starts to run amuck... something akin to a snowball effect.  One thing... impacting the next... and the next... and the next thing you know in my mind I'm 240 pounds 6 months from now and being kicked out of the military.  How realistic is it that something like that would happen???  Not very... not if I happen to not be able to work out for one single day.  It is completely irrational thinking, but yet it's there every Wednesday because it's already in my head that Wednesday = BAD.  It's also in my head that Thursday = GOOD.  Go figure?  Ahhhh... imagine how it feels to be inside the head of Jim.... LOL  It can be a pretty confusing place sometimes.  That's for sure. :) 

The rest of the day looks to be on cruise control.... relaxed, calm, and happy again... after running 4.4 miles in 45 minutes I guess I should be.  :)

Peace, Love, and Poker